You are lost

The call was made this morning; goodbye day off, hello responsibility.  I am now the Starbucks Kiosk Manager.  I go in later today to fill out the paperwork and meet the hidden hands that will hold my shiny new leash.  I’m a little excited, not too surprised, a little anxious and I feel a little… mischievous.

Running the booth, doing the orders, taking inventory, writing schedules… all this and more will be no big deal.  The hardest thing for me is probably going to be holding my tongue when the orders for change come in from corporate.  I have this idea in my mind that if I get fired from this position it’ll go something like this:

Corporate:  “Do this.”

Me:  “Are you fucking stupid?  You’re shooting yourself in the fucking foot on this one.  This is the worst thing you could do in this situation.”

Corporate:  “We at Starbucks appreciate your comments blah blah blah fired.”

Me:  “Damn.”

In other work interests it came to my attention yesterday that I can be trained and certified as a “Coffee Master”.  I’m a bit of a connoisseur as is and learning a little more wouldn’t hurt.  It’s not the bullshit made-up title I’m after.  No.  If I become a coffee master I get to wear a black apron.  Yes.  Black.  Hehehe.  I like the sound of the phony title, but it really comes down to not liking the green apron.