You are lost

I’m on to you people.

Public restrooms; second only to Port-A-Potties as the last resort for bowel relief in desperate measures.  No matter where you go there’s likely to be one about.  Sometimes you’re lucky and there’s multiple stalls to choose from, sometimes you get the unisex one-stall.  Regardless of the size, regardless as to where you are (the mall, a library, Montana, Arizona, England) you are bound to walk into a stall where someone hasn’t flushed.

Some people might feel disgusted at the sight, some might assume a clog in the plumbing could be the problem and avoid the now untouchable stall.  I have a different theory.  I know what kind of sick fetishes some of you people entertain, and I’m on to your little conspiracy you coprophiliacs.   This is intentional.  It works like a penny cup at gas stations; if you need one take one, if you have one leave one.  This way sexual deviants across the world can give each other exciting fecal surprises while the unsuspecting public blindly carries on unaware.  Unlike most bathroom swingers, these people never need to meet.  No toe tapping foot play, just drop one load or the other (or both) and be on your way.

But I’m on to you.  And your conspiracy.  And I will flush every unflushed toilet I find.  You sickos.